Hello. My name is Ashlee and I am a recovering poster child for Proverbs 29:11…part A.
Part A is the bad part.
It says, “a fool gives full vent to his anger (part A), but a wise man holds it in check (part B).”
Yep, that was me. I was the person that when I got mad, you knew it. Yeah…I let you know. I might have done a little fussing…okay, a lot of fussing, yelling, complaining and I made sure to vent all my anger and frustrations because it made me feel better. I had a hard time keeping my anger in check. I didn’t have a bad temper, but I guess you could say I wore my emotions on my sleeve…everyone knew when I was having a bad day or someone had wronged me. I was quick to let someone know immediately when they hurt me.
Fast forward to today. As I am writing and thinking back over the last few weeks, I’ve had several instances in which I wanted to “vent in my anger” and give some people a piece of my mind. Now, I already know what you are thinking…she’s a recovering Proverbs 29:11 Part A person, so she probably done told some people off…but you will be happy to know I chose to be a Part B person in each of those scenarios.
Here’s where we can cue the confetti and cheers for small victories in life!
You see, as I was reading Proverbs 29 today, it was nice to look back and see where I have grown. It was refreshing to say to myself, “Good job Ashlee for holding your tongue on ‘ole so and so” or “Aren’t you glad you didn’t say anything hurtful or retaliate when you were mistreated by Little Miss Prissy Pants? You see, it’s easy to say whatever, whenever and use the excuse, “I have no filter.” But God commands us to choose our words carefully, to be wise by holding our words in and only speaking with discernment when angered. In other words, don’t lash out at someone. Think long and hard before you open your mouth and sometimes you might just need to bite that tongue, sister.
Now if you like me and you a recovering Part A of Proverbs 29:11, then you know what how hard that can be. For me, I have found a few things that work for me and I want to share them:
- Don’t be afraid to walk away. If there’s drama, or a chance for you to open your mouth when you shouldn’t and say something foolish…remove yourself from the situation. That could be hanging up the phone, physically walking away or not replying to a message.
- Find someone that will allow you to vent. I have several people that I can call and vent to and we can pray about the situation and I can get advice on what to do. Having that sounding board keeps your anger in check.
- Lastly, love people where they are. This is the hard one. It’s tough to love someone that has hurt you…the person that really needs a piece of your mind. Instead, show love and pray for them. Honestly, when you are praying for someone you aren’t probably going to make a foolish choice with your words towards them.
A lot of what I have said pertains to people. I know that isn’t the only reason that we get angry, but usually 95% of our frustrations result from interactions with someone else. Let’s face it…people are going to be people. But, if we are going to call ourselves Christians and want to display Jesus to this world, we have to be willing to do what it takes to be a Part B of Proverbs 29:11. We have to constantly be chasing that Christ-like perfection (even though it’s unattainable), because it is our job to be Jesus to the world. Jesus never spoke a word that was not said at the right time and in the right way. He was the poster child for Part B.
There is a time to be silent and a time to speak out. We can’t be in control of everything, but we can be in control of whether our words are like Part A or Part B. I don’t want to be a recovering Part A. I want to be on the poster in people’s mind as a shining example of Part B…’cause that’s where Jesus is glorified.